Sobriety
Giving some thought to living a sober life, more questions arise than answers. Perhaps that’s because as I age, more mysteries emerge and my perspective changes. It’s easy to spend time wondering if my thoughts are changing due to age or the changing world around me. Alcohol distorts mysteries and perspectives like a prism distorts light.
I spoke with a dear friend on the phone today only to learn that he recently suffered a mild heart attack. At age 59, I wasn’t dismayed or suprised. That’s because over the years, my perspective has changed. Health conditions develop during these “golden years,” accelerating as years accumulate. Not much a mortal can do. From what I’ve seen of advantages and drawbacks, one can live too long a life or die too soon. Always with the illusion that we humans have some control over that event. It’s important now, more than ever, to remember what I control and what I don’t.
As far as sobriety is concerned, it both floats on the surface of life and descends to the depths of my existence. Sure, I can show up for work, social and family events as a balanced person who doesn’t drink alcohol. On the same occasion I might also displace the sword of Damocles swinging above my head long enough to live in the moment and enjoy the event. That’s a luxury that sobriety affords me, the ability to live in this crystalline moment and be present.
Somehow, I must contend with the fact that events are outside my control, most of them. Politics, family, work, society, they all follow their own patterns and designs. My big choice is how I interact with them. Just like health issues that confront me and my loved ones, my only choice is in how I respond. The best response I can muster is a sober outlook. One that acknowledges life’s emotional reactions but looks beyond them. Sobriety favors sensible choices. If we are dealt a seven, an ace and a three, we play those cards the best we can, sensibly.
Alcohol robs me of my ability to make serious choices. Alcohol and emotions are inexorably linked in a never-ending wrestling match. I’m not sure which triumphs but for me, the result is anything but sensible. Initially, escaping life’s serious mysteries and changes for a moment appears attractive. But in the end, I confine myself to a pitiful cycle of repetition guaranteeing a closed-circuit experience, suffering.
So, for today I choose to use the simple kit of spiritual tools that have been afforded me, The Twelve Steps, meditation and prayer. They are not as glamorous as a television ad for Cuervo Gold but my head doesn’t hurt in the morning and I gain back the three days of clearing the fog and getting back on my feet. In the meantime, I get something out of life by contributing. That just feels good and for me, that’s sensible. Sobriety.
Sobriety:
so·ber
/ˈsōbər/
adjective
adjective: sober; comparative adjective: soberer; superlative adjective: soberest
1. not affected by alcohol; not drunk.
serious, sensible, and solemn.
“a sober view of life”
free from alcoholism; not habitually drinking alcohol.
“I’ve been clean and sober for five years”
verb
make or become sober after drinking alcohol.
“that coffee sobered him up“
make or become more serious, sensible, and solemn.
“his expression sobered her”
Renaissance Sober Living 